A Slightly Post Quarter Life Crisis Survival Guide

I’m going to make it a goal to start all of my “serious” posts with a fun fact about me!  I might eventually run out of fun facts, but that seems unlikely.  This week’s fun fact is about my anatomy!  I have SUPER flat feet…..like piece o’ plywood flat.  Seems weird but it lets me perform an awesome quirk.  If my feet are wet and I gently hop I can suction my feet to the floor!  It’s totally pointless, but it gives me the giggles that’s all the counts.  Also, I have an extra bone in each foot.

Down to the nitty gritty of this weeks topic.  Who would have thought that the last week in the shortest month of the year could be such a bitchface?!?!  This week has slapped me in the face several times for a variety of reasons.  I’m quite sure that my attempts at being healthy gave me food poisoning not once….but twice!  General feelings of ickyness combined with a variety of nightmares at work have caused me to ask one question at the end of each day.

I mean really…..who approved this!?

This question in the evenings has been leading to feelings reminiscent of this in the mornings…..

I mean how could you make this cute little face adult today!?

Some days you just can’t…..I mean you always can, but you just don’t want to.  It’s a fact of life and everyone feels like that now and again.  What’s important is that you don’t let these feelings overwhelm you.  I get it….sometimes being an adult sucks, and nothing really prepares you for it.  I’m going to paraphrase the great Ron White about leaving college and having to start adulting. “I didn’t want to adult. I wanted to be drunk in college and you threw me into adulthood!”  If you are confused on the reference, YouTube his drunk in public skit, you’ll understand.  College taught me the value of my friends, the importance of making memories, and it showed me what I was capable of when I applied myself.  Nothing teaches you what you’re made of like all night writing sessions for multiple lab reports at once. Of course, college also taught me a variety of stupid things too.  For example, the best ways to procrastinate those lab reports!

Must watch all the stupid videos!!

I think this is how most people view starting out on the path to grownupville.  One day everything is all frat parties and homework (WHICH SEEMS LIKE A STRUGGLE AT THE TIME).  The next you’ve getting a diploma and suddenly you have to 180 your lifestyle and deal with things that are an actual struggle….

Preach Johnny Preach!

Lately I find that I’ve been having more of these struggle bus days that usual.  I have decided to name this small dip in my general fantasticness my “slightly post quarter life crisis”.  My life crisis is characterized by general feelings of meh.  I think it has more to do with realizing that my life isn’t going the way I might have planned it when I were 18 and shall we say…stupid.  To be clear, I don’t feel sad or depressed…..just meh.

• Meh I don’t have a boyfriend. On the other hand, do I want a boyfriend….meh.
• Meh my job is boring, but to the point that I want to start a job search…..meh.
• The list could go on, but I’m sure you get the point.

During these periods of meh I try to focus on all the positives in my life…

• I own a home and generally have the life skills required to update various aspects of my house on my own!
• I get to come home to my pupster’s adorable face everyday!
• I make enough money to pay all my bills, put some money into savings, and still have fun money for my life whims.
• I have supportive family and friends who encourage and back me in my life adventures!
• The mantra at the end of every workout at my gym comes to mind, “be grateful for your strong body and mind that has carried you through this workout.”

It’s also important to realize that your fabulous twenty something friends are also going through their own post quarter life crises and you can lean on each other for support.

This can not be stressed enough!

Some of the funniest and most motivational words of wisdom have come from my friends.  I want to leave you with a few of my favorite friend quotes to help tackle your toughest adult struggle bus moments!

• “Sir-Mix-A-Lot and I don’t agree on what’s important!” – Sometimes you don’t want to motivate to the gym and squat… and that’s ok!
• “Sushi will fix everything….have faith!” – Cuz sometimes you just need some snacks!
• “Life is a shithole and no one gets out alive.” – When homework leads to deep philosophical epiphanies!
• “When I’m drunk and don’t know what to say I just flip you off and walk away!” – Who wants to deal with people trying to kill your buzz?!
• “Take some emergen-c and put on your big girl pants” – When you’re debating life choices that are at best questionable but fun.
• “I told him you would eat him alive.” – Sometimes you have to pick and choose who you date.
• “Don’t sweat the small shit….and it’s all small shit!” – Sometimes Dad’s advice trumps your friends though!

If you’ve reached your absolute wits end and still don’t know what to do about your post quarter life crisis just remember that sometimes this can be the answer….

Sometimes you just need to find a good happy hour and sip it out!

A Flock of Narcoleptics, a Joan Rivers’ Mantra, and Thigh Gap

Hello again friends!  With wine in hand and Guardians of the Galaxy on the tv I have decided it is time to write.  Before we get to the really serious meat I’ll start our night together with a Fun Fact about me….

According to the American Academy of Sleep Medicine, approximately 1% of the population suffers from Narcolepsy. (Yes….I googled that fact, I’m a chemistry major…..research is my thing!)  While at college I met two guys who are narcoleptic.  For the sake of the Fun Fact, we shall assume they weren’t trying to impress me with some strange diagnosis and that they both are actually narcoleptic.  Now, if 1% of the population is narcoleptic it would be a bit odd for someone to know anyone with the condition.  Several people I have asked don’t know anyone.  I know two people and I have kissed both of them!  I’m apparently some sort of magnet for sleepy guys….BOOM fact about me!!!

Anywho….on to something a bit more important.  Earlier this week I found a Yahoo! article about the late Joan Rivers.  Mostly the article was about her New York Penthouse but there was a line that stuck out to me.  Joan had an embroidered pillow in her office which read, “Don’t expect praise without envy, until death.”  Granted, I don’t think that Joan actually said this, but it was her pillow so I’ll let her have it for the night.  The quote really resonated with me, and probably all of you can also relate.  How often do you see someone with something you want, and you make a rash judgement about the kind of person they might be.  Maybe its just me, I can be a bit on the bitchy side of life sometimes, but I’m betting we have all done it at one point or another.

The quote took on a more personal meaning for me during my Monday night Indo-Row class.  Lately there has been a group of college girls who have started coming to my gym.  Great for the gym owners, annoying for me.  They giggle weird, they are always saving spots for friends who show up late, and worst they are cute!  That short, size itty bitty sort of perfect with great hair and young confidence that I never had and will probably work everyday towards having them.  Even though the envy I felt was 100% REAL, I never praised them.  I’m not sure I had even spoken to any of them until Monday night.

Now, I love rowing!  I’m built to row!  Tall, ganglier than I should be, and leg muscle for days, I can move some serious water.  Rowing class generally ends in a team race.  So we are racing along relay style and it’s my turn to row.  I was rowing at about 13 mph, which is fairly close to my max speed at the end of a double workout day.  The college girl next to me turns to her friend and with huge eyes says, “Woah, she’s really going fast!”  Afterwards, she asked me a couple questions about how often I take rowing classes and the classes I take at the gym.  I realized that everyone is envious of what they don’t have, and it was at that moment that I became ok.  I became ok with just being me; tall, no thigh gap, and usually slightly frizzy hair me.  Yeah, seeing sunshine through my thighs might make them prettier which could be nice I guess.  Want to know what’s actually nice though?!?!  I’ve got muscle, and that muscle does work!!  I decide I want to row 150 meters in 23 seconds….my legs will do that for me.  That my friends is power, and anymore I’ll take power over thigh gap anyday.  That isn’t something I would have said a year ago but I’ll say it now.  Moral of this sort of long story….be yourself.  Embrace yourself and challege yourself to be the best YOU can be!  Don’t settle for trying to achieve some pseudo-version of the person next to you because odds are they are wishing they could be some version of you.

Hello World!

Happy Hump Day!  I decided to start blogging to share the (mis)happenings of my life with the world.  Hopefully they will inspire, motivate, and entertain other people as much as they have me.  I’m a girl of wide and sometimes obscenely varied interests and this blog will tackle all of them.  From food to dating to everyday life there really isn’t a story I won’t share.

A bit about me:

I’m a …..late….twenty something single girl born, raised, and currently tearing it up in South Dakota.  I have a rescue mutt named Scout who I adore more than most people.  We (the dog and I) recently bought and moved into a new house which keeps us occupied, but it also gives me a good excuse to spend plenty of time on Pintrest.  As long as I’m disclosing some slightly guilty pleasures, I feel the need to disclose that I counted my shoes when I moved and I have 44 pairs. Yes, that’s correct…44 pairs of shoes. I love them all dearly!

I have a bachelor’s degree in Chemistry and the periodic table print TOMS to match!  I was feeling under stimulated in my job and decided to go back to school.  I’m currently a distance student at my alma mater pursuing a Master’s of Engineering Management.

I’ve discovered that most of my problems can easily be solved or ignored with cheap champagne and a bubble bath. Wine never hurt anyone either.  I think this means that I don’t really have any “important” problems.  Trust me when I say I generally have only the most absurd middle class white girl issues.  More on that later.

That’s all for now, see you back here soon!