Choose Your Own Series of Unfortunate Events

Several events recently have forced me to wonder how much say we actually have in our own lives.  I know that everyone always says, “You’re in charge of what happens to you!” and “Your future is always in your own hands!”……but is it really?!  Lately, it feels like lots of things get decided for me, and I just have to react to them.  That isn’t to mean I don’t have a choice, it just seems like the choices we’re given in life are usually slightly unfavorable.

For example…..health insurance……any way you slice it, it’s expensive and frankly not that great.  Either you have to pay a million dollars a month in premiums, or pay a million dollar fine if you choose not to carry coverage.  Technically, you have a choice, but the options aren’t great.  It can be even worse if your insurance dictates what doctors you can and can’t see.  That’s what happened in my state because the two large hospitals are in charge of the insurance.  They decided they couldn’t find a “favorable” choice with each other, so they decided to pass the crappiness on to the general population.  But!!!  A big wig at one of the hospitals was interviewed by a news channel and was quick to remind us that we have several amazing choices!

  • We can switch doctors so that we can pay in-network amounts……
  • We can pay out of network prices to keep our physicians who used to be covered under the insurance plans……..OR and the “option we obviously don’t prefer”
  • We can try and find insurance through someone else

I get that these are technically all options, and that I do have a choice….but someone needs to explain to me how any of these are good options for me, because I’m just not seeing it.  I was so excited this year to not have to tinker with my insurance, but that’s all gone down the drain now!

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When you feel like you’re finally starting to get a handle on life.  You can hold your head up, you’re styling, and your ducks are finally in a row….

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….and suddenly things go drastically downhill, you no longer have any idea what’s happening to you, and your ducks start wandering around in confused circles of crazy.

These are baby pictures of me…..illustrating that some of us get on the struggle bus sooner than others, but I think once you’re there you can’t get off.  It’s a bit like the Hotel California that way I suppose, “You can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave!”  I made it 12.5 weeks before I got on the bus, still riding strong today!

Another example……my HOA dues…..  If the board doesn’t receive a unanimous YES vote to changing the by-laws, dues will have to skyrocket.  It’s a bit involved so I won’t bore you with the details, but my ability to comfortably afford to continue living in my house now rests in the hands of the 142 other votes the board needs for approval.  What election in the history of ever has had 100% voter turnout…..and then that 100% turnout all voting the same way?!?!  The odds don’t feel like they are running much in my favor.  Again thought, I suppose I have options……sell my house and move, or drastically adjust the way I live my life.

Why are all the options we are given as adults crappy?!?

Although, to be fair, little kids have there share of crappy options too…..we as a adults just have a hard time rationalizing then as shitty.

Case in point, last night we had a large, extended family pizza party.  My cousin’s little toddler of a son was slightly annoyed cuz he had been too busy to nap…..option 1.  He was given the chance to nap, but why nap and miss out on things when you can stay up and maybe just be a lil bit annoyed.

At some point previously he had bitten his cheek which was only being aggravated by the pizza sauce, you know that feeling…..it’s unpleasant at best!  When given the option of ice cream instead of pizza, he got quite upset because he didn’t want the ice cream….he wanted pizza.  Now, as an adult….pizza or ice cream (frankly both) would be equally acceptable dinner time options.  The tiny nugget however, didn’t realize that ice cream was a perfectly acceptable dinner time selection and instead insisted on trying to suffer through pizza.  He had options, he just didn’t view any of them as great and had to suffer through what in his little mind was the better choice…..even if that meant extreme mouth owies with every bite.

Maybe when you boil it down and get right down to the nitty gritty, life is just a choose your own adventure book, only that the adventure usually is a series of unfortunate events.  Sure the events change and morph as we get older, and your unfortunate event might be someone else’s dream…I get all that.  But, unfortunate events are in the eye of the beholder, so I guess we will all just keep having to making choices, flipping ahead to the assigned page, and fingers crossed that we don’t regret our decisions.

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Blue Jean Blues, Fake Flannel, and a Graduation Goal

UUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH

Why, why, why, must buying blue jeans be one of life’s greatest mysteries?  I don’t understand why guys can walk in anywhere, grab a pair of jeans, and everything is fine.  With all of our scientific and technological advances, you’d think we could transfer that “magic” to women’s jeans!?  Even if you think you know what you want…..nothing will ever fit you like you think it should.

I’m size mouse at Gap, and size walrus as H&M. Make up your *$% damn minds!”

On a side note….go watch all of Matt Bellassi’s Whine About It videos. They are hilarious. He’s like my gay, drunk spirit animal! He totally understands my feelings on life!

Last night, Momma and I tried on 9 pairs of jeans between us.  All of the jean styles I ordered I have previously worn….do you think that any of them fit……well….yes and no.  Yes, they all technically fit, but for some reason The Buckle decided to change their denim blend to that lovely early 2000’s super stretch!  Ugh, high school me would have been super amped, adult me is sorta less enthused.  Momma ended up with a couple new pairs, most of her’s were ruled out due to length, although one horrible pair was way too big, bad, and bulky in the hip area.

This week I also ordered an oversized flannel hoodie off the interwebs.  I was super excited until I received it, and realized it was an awful polyester/acrylic blend.  Ugh…..that’s not what flannel is!  Flannel is supposed to be soft….and glorious…..and warm…..and make you want to curl up with cider, in your boots, on a crispy fall day.  This on the other hand is sorta itchy, feels waxy, isn’t all that warm, and if I kept it would most likely hang ignored in my closet.  Luckily, Momma came to the rescue measuring and sketching a pattern.  Then she did find an actual pattern for a pajama shirt that is actually the same size.  It will need some slight modifications, but I think it will do the trick very nicely.  Momma rescue for the win!!  

Sex and the City taught us many things….I should have remembered this life lesson!

Yesterday, on the drive down to Momma’s, I decided that when I graduate with my Master’s I’m going to buy myself a boat.  The family that bought our Sea Jet has her out at the marina, in a slip, and they appear to be spending lots of time out on her.  Which makes me happy, but also super jealous.  So, to deal with this I’m going to buy myself a new Sunfish.  Graduation will be the perfect time too…..just in time for summertime funtime!  Time to commence a more stringent budget I guess……